Money For Nothing?
So you’re out to dinner with your lady or your man and the bill comes. Who pays?
Chivalry typically dictates that the man pay. Always. But this isn’t the middle ages. And there’s a generation of women who are offended if a man holds open a door for them.
So how does the geek community feel about who pays? Are geeks more old school and expect the men to always pay? Or are geeks more enlightened and demand equality in absolutely everything? Or is it a combination, the man is expected to pay in the beginning but things even out once the relationship starts?
Stumble it! Explore posts in the same categories: geek love, Angry Zen Master
March 21st, 2008 at 2:30 pm
I think its a combination. I expected to pay for everything when I started dating my girlfriend. Once things even out (say maybe date number 15-20 or so), if she offers to pay I’ll let her. College ain’t cheap.
March 21st, 2008 at 4:47 pm
I’m old school, I absolutely HAVE to at least TRY and pay for it. If she really wants to I can go halvsies though. As for getting offended at holding doors those girls need to get a grip, my parents raised a well mannered boy and I do and will always open them for complete friggin strangers lol, even if I get stuck holding it for half the buildings occupants…..
March 21st, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Usually we split it. If we can’t even it out, a quick flip of a coin’ll sort it out.
March 22nd, 2008 at 4:16 am
Gotta say i’m the same with doors, put me near one and i’ll be there for hours holding it open. It’s like its burned into my genetic code! But i’ve never met anyone who was ungrateful.
March 23rd, 2008 at 6:01 am
As a general rule of my own, the one who invites, pays, unless they specifically state they’re only up for their share. (Not half. Nobody with half a brain goes half with me. I get the biggest honkin’ steak available. Always. Even if I have to sell a kidney to afford it.)
March 24th, 2008 at 6:55 pm
I have been dressed-down (by parental-types and contemporaries alike) for paying, NOT paying, holding open doors or lack thereof, for saying “Yes Ma’am” at apparently inappropriate times, and for bringing flowers.
Regardless of whom you are, I’ll offer to pay if there’s money to spare. Sharing my good fortune with good company can’t be beat. If I’m with you and you offer to pay half, sure, I won’t turn it down. Same goes for the door. Just don’t let it hit your butt on the way out!
May 1st, 2008 at 7:39 am
Chivalry’s dead, and when it existed it was a farce. Past generations of women worked hard to be treated no differently than men in North America, and it goes without being said that succeeding generations of women must be treated accordingly. That said, every guy’s got to know what he’s going to do before he does it. I’ll hold a door open for a woman and man, all the same. If I ask a gal out on a date, if she takes initiative to pay her part of the bill, I’ll respectfully decline that specific offer, but I will make a note to go Dutch next time as she’s voiced an interest in carrying her own weight and show I can respect her boundaries. Mind you, I only say that because I’m not taking women to some 5 star restaurant to eat every date. A guy who needs help paying for something at a fast food chain restaurant probably has bigger money problems than that.
Frankly, any gal who’s offended by a guy she’s on a date with having some class, by holding a door, or paying the bill when he invites her to spend time with him, definitely needs to relax her feminist values, or take the initiative and ask out the guys and treat them instead. Lord knows I’d love it if more women showed some initiative, or decisiveness, in asking me out, rather then just giving me passive buying signals.